


Our heir.

by Batmango



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Crack, Gen, I'm Bad At Tagging, Ra's Al Ghul is a Confused Grandfather
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-11-02 02:32:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17879414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Batmango/pseuds/Batmango
Summary: The Head of the Demon tracks down the Detective for an important discussion.Bruce is perplexed by how much of an old coot Ra's can be.





	Our heir.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic and as I'm not a native English speaker I apologizes in advance for any rough english.
> 
> The fic follow not specific continuity.

This is a work of fanfiction and no copyright infringement is intended.  
All characters belong to their respective owners.

“Detective, I demand an explanation!“

Bruce was unsure what he had done to earn a ‘visit’ by his… by his son's grandfather. “As you can see I'm rather busy at the moment.” A punch to the throat sent the closest of the Joker's thugs to the floor wheezing for breath. “So tell me what your problem is.” The next creep got a kick to the knee then a knee to the face. 

“It is about my grandson…” Swish, thud then a groan. “Your betters are speaking curr.” Batman turned around to see the last henchman sink to the ground clutching his gut as the Head of the Demon adjusted his grip on a walking cane.

“Damian is fine.” The Caped Crusader snapped. “I shall take your word for it, but it is his future I worry for.”

Quickly checking his surroundings the Caped Crusader advanced deeper into the abandoned factory. Making no effort to hide Ra's continued. “Our heir is almost 14 and still not a word of a wedding or even an engagement.”

Bruce’s ironclad willpower clamped down on the urge to stare at the immortal and bellow something. “This has to wait. The Joker…” “Has been dealt with.” Holding up a hand Al-Ghul continued. “As these are your demesne I have respected your decrees, the ghoul lives. However as the depraved craven has seen fit so harm my grandchildren in the past I avanged myself upon him.”

Dear goodness, he could have just said he beat him up as payback for hurting Damian. Batman thought to himself bemused. “He still needs to be secured.”

Hurring into the next room Batman could see the crumpled clown-prince of crime laying on one of the walkways above. He couldn’t make out all the detail but judging by the numerous dark bruises on creep king’s face he would have to stick to a strictly liquid diet for the foreseeable future.

Sweeping his eyes across the room Bruce was meet by the rather surprising sight of Harleen Quinzel suspended over a vat of some sort. Using his grapple gun he swung the former villainess away from the no-doubt poisonous pool and then cable with a batarang.

Making short work of Harleen’s restraints the Dark Knight started checking her for serious injuries. “Hey Mistah B no need ta get all handys. Ahm fine.” Standing up and brushing of dust the doctor smile died was she saw the stranger. “Ey Batsy, yah know this here mook? He came in here where the rat-bastard had me hanging, went all Punch ‘n Judy on the rat-bastard and left me dangling over that pool o’ gawd knows what.” Before Bruce could get a word in Ra’s had gotten started. “I am Ra’s Al-Ghul, Head of the Demon, leader of the League of Shadows and you will cease speaking unless you want a first-hand encore of the show he got.”

“Stop it!” Seeing he had startled them both Batman plunged ahead. “Harl, don’t provoke the ancient assassin lord.” “And Ra’s I really expected better from you than to leave a defenceless woman dangling over a pool of poison.” The ‘Except for when you put her there to begin with.’ was unsaid.

“So what is this talk about Damian and weddings?” Glancing over at Quinzel Al-Ghul wondered “Do you really wish to talk about this with an outsider attending?” “Doctor Quinzel knows the truth and has not betrayed that trust.” Not to mention Batman thought, she makes for a somewhat credible witness to whatever madness the Demon’s Head was cooking up.

“Very well Detective. As I said before it is well past-due that our heir acquire a worthy companion.” Handing over scroll, a list of names Bruce realized as he took it in, Ra’s continued “While your deceptions necessitates certan dillances I will not see my grandson raked through the mud by the rags of Gotham’s. Narrow down your selection to five or ten names and you, myself and Talia can start talks in earnest a month hence.” Apparently deciding that he was done Ra's’ Al-Ghul, Head of the Demon and royal pain in Bruce's posterior turned to leave. “Oh, I am open to a suggestion or two but be warned Detective they will be vetted to my satisfaction.”

And with that he was gone. Refocusing Batman took a deep breath followed by a sigh. Suddenly Harleen was at his shoulder looking over the list of names. “Ehh B man, does that tall stick of beef jerky realise Black’s ya boys sister?”

Groaning Batman looked to his former foe. “What am I going to do? He is far too young to get married.” Patting Batman on the cowl Harley Quinn attempted to reassure the cramped cavalier “Ya could try hanging him down to a date or two for now, play it fer time ya know?”

The End

**Author's Note:**

> So the idea for this was basically that Ra's lives by some very outdated standard and part of that would be marrying at a pretty early age. This was kinda written with the idea that Ra's wants to mend some fences with the batfam but doesn't know how to do that.
> 
> Also, yes Cassandra Cain is on the list of suggested brides for Damian. The old kook has taken a few dips in the Lazarus pits after all.
> 
> So yeah, let me know what you think about this little weird thing I made.


End file.
